Muskogee police say people from all walks of life — wives of local doctors, lawyers, bankers, businessmen, ministers, police officers — have been victims of domestic abuse in Muskogee.
Ronica Pickens, 24, has first-hand knowledge about domestic abuse and the trail of pain that it leaves in its wake. On May 3, when she arrived to pick up her children who had spent the day with their father, Julius Walker, 31, something set him off, and he went into a rage.
The couple’s 5- and 6-year-old children witnessed the beating Walker gave her, and Pickens feels like she barely escaped with her life.
“This is the second time he tried to kill me — this time he really did a number on me,” she said, tears sliding down her cheeks.
She said he told her in the past if she ever called the police on him for beating her that he would find her and kill her.
“I’ve been very afraid of him,” she said.
Although she thought she would be free from his abuse and was not living with him, the connection with her children continued to put her at risk. Walker had a history of time in prison for the very same thing. He was on parole during the latest attack.
Other components can contribute to abuse
But, for some, economic stress can be a big factor in domestic abuse, said Muskogee Police Investigator Sgt. Greg Martin.
Domestic abuse locally is on the rise, and Gwyn LaCrone, director of the Women in Safe Home (WISH) shelter, agrees that financial problems are one reason.
A low-income mother with small children might appear on statistical reports after getting a restraining order, entering a domestic violence shelter or applying for government financial aid, according to a U.S. Department of Justice publication.
National reports reflect the lower the income, the higher the chance of domestic violence, but professionals in high-stress jobs also can be abusers, according to national studies.
A battered woman with money might check into a hotel for a few weeks, file for divorce or move where family members can help her, the same report states. LaCrone said national statistics show a woman leaves her abuser seven to 10 times before leaving for good.
Women able to provide for themselves and their children may not report the abuse as readily, local police say. Police investigators Ginny Bemo and Shannon Crary said women beaten by the men they marry or live with often are embarrassed. They don’t want to publicize their plight by filing a police report. If they do file a report, they often don’t want the case prosecuted.
Women married or living with professionals often can’t access family money when they leave, LaCrone said.
“A lot of times the abuser controls the finances,” she said.
There are income and employment issues and poor self-esteem issues, she said.
The Oklahoma Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board recommends that district attorneys work with law enforcement to collect and preserve evidence in cases where a victim wants to drop charges.
Muskogee County District Attorney Larry Moore said that is routinely done. Prosecutors take into consideration the severity of the abuse, the frequency, as well as whether or not anger management or counseling would help or if incarceration is called for, Moore said.
There is a difference between being shoved or slapped and suffering major bodily harm, he said.
“Some people definitely need to be locked up,” Moore said. “We don’t automatically dismiss a case because a victim wants us to.”
Often times the victim has no income and that concern, or fear of their abuser, prompts the request to drop charges, he said.
Abuse can affect teens who date
And adult women aren’t the only victims of domestic abuse. One in five Oklahoma high school students have reported being hit, slapped or physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend — compared to 9 percent of all students nationwide, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.
Evelyn Hibbs, executive director of WISH, Inc., said high school girls often don’t realize controlling habits of boyfriends are red flags of potential domestic violence.
“They take it as a compliment when a boyfriend has control issues,” Hibbs said.
By the time victims seek help from WISH, their self-esteem is usually “trodden down to nothing,” LaCrone said.
Services available to restart lives
Victims who seek help from WISH are provided with services from various agencies in parenting, nutrition, domestic violence and learn how to identify red flags put up by a potential abuser, LaCrone said. Those red flags include being possessive, “hovering” and wanting to isolate someone from friends and relatives.
LaCrone said WISH helps victims get anger management training. Co-dependency courses are available, she said.
In addition, transportation, housing and employment are a big stumbling block for many victims trying to become independent, she said. WISH tries to help with both.
“Many walk away (from abuser) with nothing,” LaCrone said. “Most lack job skills. Many can’t even make choices about small, everyday things. They are completely beaten down.”
Many of the younger victims have felony records, making employment even a bigger hurdle, LaCrone said.
Victims who have moved from the shelter and are trying to make a home often attend Monday night meetings of a support group hosted by WISH, LaCrone said.
The most important need of victims emotionally is to build self-esteem. That is a major aim of WISH, she said.
The average number of women in the shelter on any given day is between 15 and 20, she said. At one time last fall there were 22 women and 24 children.
The Oklahoma Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board looked at 216 domestic violence homicide incidents from 1998 to 2006 which revealed adults witnessed the homicides in 44 percent of the incidents. Children witnessed one-third of the slayings.
Sixty-one percent of the perpetrators did not have a prior conviction record. Protective orders had been issued in 20 percent of the reviewed cases. In 67 percent of the cases where a protective order was active at the time of the homicide, the defendant had violated the order prior to killing the victim.
Law enforcement had responded to previous domestic disturbances in 28 percent of the cases and in 59 percent of the cases, other people were aware the violence was occurring.
The U.S. Justice Department reported that on average in 2005, more than three women a day were murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in the U.S.
What to do
If you need help in a domestic violence situation, call:
Oklahoma Safeline: (800) 522-SAFE (7233).
National Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 799-7233 (SAFE).
Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network Hotline: (800) 656-4673 (HOPE).
Communication Services for the Deaf: (800) 252-1017 (TTY)/ (866) 845-7445 (Voice).
If you need general information about domestic violence, call:
• Oklahoma Coalition Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault: (405) 524-0700 or www.ocadvsa.org
• The Office of the Attorney General, Victim Services Unit: (405) 521-3921.
• If you need more information about the Oklahoma Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board, please call:
Oklahoma Criminal Justice Resource Center: (405) 524-5900.
Source: The Oklahoma Coalition Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault
You can help
WISH (Women in Safe Home) can always use donations for victims of domestic abuse. Among the items needed are personal items — including toothpaste, deodorant and feminine products.
When victims leave the shelter, they often have nothing to set up housekeeping. Pots and pans, throw rugs, furniture and household items are needed, she said. Nine of the rooms at WISH have no portable television sets.
If you would like to make a donation, call 682-7879.
Oklahoma domestic violence homicides
The Oklahoma Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board’s 2007 report identified 776 domestic abuse homicides in Oklahoma over the 10 years ending in December 2007.
The Oklahoma Criminal Justice Resource Center issued a publication on the statistics of that study, showing the cause of death for the 776 victims:
• 53 percent, firearms.
• 19 percent, blunt force trauma
• 13 percent, cutting/piercing
• 4 percent, strangulation
• 2 percent, asphyxiation
• 3 percent, undetermined
• 6 percent, all other causes of death
Of those, 16 percent (126) of all homicides resulted from homicide-suicides.
Type of homicides for the 776 victims included:
• 48 percent intimate partner homicides.
• 43 percent family member homicides.
• 7 percent triangular homicides (a woman’s ex-boyfriend kills her new boyfriend or vice versa).
• 1 percent killed by roommates.
• 1 percent killed were good Samaritans (non-involved people who intervene in a domestic violence altercation on behalf of the victim).
Source: Oklahoma Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board
